I figured that if I’m going to do article clean-ups, I should at least show the proof a bit. This is the following text under a section titled “Abilities” for the character Christopher Carrion.
“Carrion uses nightmares found in his liquid collar to send nightmares to his prisoners. These nightmares are monsters that swim from inside Carrions brain into his collar made of flesh. They give off a eerie light. These nightmares instile fear inside Carrions enemies and his prisoners often do not survive. Many people know of these nightmares and fear them greatly for they make your greates nightmares come true. Carrion’s collar later breakes in a fight with Mater Motley and his nightmares multiply rapidly in hopes of protecting their master.”
This is wrong, and confusing for a mental picture. First it states that his nightmares are found in his “liquid collar.” Yes, I realize they mean a collar filled with liquid, but the placement of the words suggests his collar is made of liquid to me. Then it states that the nightmares are “monsters that swim from inside Carrions brain into his collar made of flesh. They give off a eerie light.” First I guess I’ll make fun of their grammar the Facebook way. *Carrion’s *an eerie. Secondly, this is a very bad way to describe it in my opinion. When it describes the nightmares as monsters, it suggest some sort of physical form. Maybe like a leprechuan sized yeti with wings? What else comes to mind when you say monster? My way of desribing the nightmares are snakish forms of lightning. That at least fits in with the next description of them giving off an eerie light. The worst part about this is that it states that nightmares swim from his brain into his “collar made of flesh.” First it was liquid, now it’s flesh? I don’t want to be too critical but I have to call into question the credibility of whoever wrote this. Carrion’s collar that wraps around his head is not made of liquid or flesh. It’s not specified what it is made out of, but it does say “translucent material.” I picture dsome sort of plastic or polycarbonate when I first read about Carrion. Later its suggested it’s a type of glass. But when they say collar made of liquid, I think some sort of suspended water or even gelatin. When they say collar made of flesh, I’m think some animal or human’s skin and muscle ripped off and sewed into a collar. That’s certainly not out of Carrion’s range of evil doings, but clearly not how the book describes his collar. The picture in the article shows Carrion, his collars, and his nightmares, so I’m not sure just how the editor who wrote that got so far off.
Anyways, I’ve replaced the “Abilities” description with this:
Carrion is a very gifted sorcerer, able to conjure a great many things. He can use the powdered bones of a mummified body to create a giant moth, and also see through the eyes of it. Somehow he has found a way to harness his nightmares in a semi-corporeal form as long, snaky forms of lightning. With these he is said to be able to relive his nightmares when they run against his skin. He also suggested that he is able to interrogate dead bodies if he has to.
Although, I have to say I’m really not too partial on an abilities section, but I’ll leave it up for now until I find a better way to say what needs to be said about his particular brand of dark magic.